By [bigletter]Interpersonal conflicts are not unusual in the Church of God. They can disrupt the smooth fellowship of the Church even when there is growth, the Spirit is moving, and the gospel is advancing. During those seasons of conflict, when we’re pulling away from each other instead of pulling together toward Christ, what we need more than anything else is the peace of God. But how might we find the peace of God that passes understanding?[/bigletter]
Paul tells us how in Philippians 4: 1-9.
The Dilemma
Paul reveals a timeless dilemma, “disagreements sometimes arise between Christians who faithfully labor together for the gospel.”
Euodias and Syntyche have a disagreement and Paul entreats them to agree in the Lord (Verse 2). That disagreement is disrupting the fellowship of the church to such a degree that it has made it to Paul’s ears. Imagine you have two daughters who are fighting about something that, in the grand scheme of things, is no big deal. Before you know it, their argument fills the whole house and everybody’s on edge. At some point, you have to step into that conflict, don’t you?
The most intense arguments often arise between those who know each other best and love each other most. Do you know why? Because if you didn’t care about what they think, you wouldn’t argue about it.
Paul acknowledges that Euodias and Syntyche have labored side by side with him in the gospel and that their names are in the Book of Life. So, we see that they are not godless, hateful pagans. It is important to note that Paul does not use derogatory terms about them. He does not question their salvation. He doesn’t call them heretics or reprobates. He acknowledges that they are sisters in Christ among the redeemed of God, yet they need to agree in the Lord.
You can clearly see that the church at Philippi is growing, experiencing great fellowship in the Lord, and affecting gospel advance effectively as a community of believers. So, you would be right to assume that there is a measure of peace between the members. However, remember that even in our straining forward together, worthy of the gospel, we’re not yet perfected. We all still have things to work on. We’re still predisposed in our flesh, to sin against one another. The Church is full of real people who have real problems just like you. And listen, we are in an environment that is entirely conducive to that.
So, the dilemma of Christian peace is that disagreement sometimes arises between Christians who faithfully labor together for the gospel.
The Exhortation
Paul exhorts Euodias and Syntyche to demonstrate the ethics of Christian peace. This is just like you have rules of conduct in your home to help you keep the peace.
What are the ethics of peace in God’s house?
Paul offers 3 rules of conduct (Verses 4 – 6, and 8).
The First Ethic of Christian Peace: Be Rejoiceful
Paul admonishes us to rejoice in the Lord always (Verse 4). It’s interesting that this comes to us in the middle of the context of conflict. This means even in the seasons of sharp disagreement in the Church, we should still be able to maintain an ethic of Christian rejoicing. Paul says in Philippians 3:14 that we’re supposed to fix our eyes firmly on the upward call of God in Christ Jesus. And when you do, conflicts are just momentary distractions. You just keep going and you keep refocusing your attention and your affection on those thoughts that are worthy of Christ.
What kind of thoughts is worthy of Christ? Paul lists them in verse eight. He says, “dwell on these things.” What things? Whatever is true. Stop and think. That assumes that when we disagree, there is something between us that is not true. And so he says, don’t focus on that. Refocus your attention, and dwell on whatever is true.
He continues,
focus on whatever is honorable,
focus on whatever is just,
focus on whatever is pure,
focus on whatever is lovely,
focus on whatever is commendable,
focus on whatever is excellent,
focus on whatever is worthy of praise.
So if you’re going to maintain an ethic of Christian rejoicing, you have to pick out those things between you that are worthy of your attention and worthy of Christ. And you meet each other there. You think on these things, you dwell on these things, and in so doing you’re able to rejoice in the Lord always.
The Second Ethic of Christian Peace: Be Equitable
Let your moderation be known unto all men (Verse 5). Being equitable means being reasonable, fair, sensible, being gentle with one another. This should be a public equitability. He says to let it be known to everyone.
And what’s the driving force behind that? When you start seeing people who are your brothers and sisters in Christ as having something in common, instead of seeing them as opposition or as the enemy, it changes the way you enter dialogue with them. Why this is important is in Verse 5. The reason you should be equitable is that the Lord is at hand. The dad of the house is in the driveway. What’s he going to find between you when he comes in the door?
The Third Ethic of Christian Peace: Be Prayerful
Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving, let your request be known to God (Verse 6).
Most of the time, interpersonal conflict spreads in the church because we talk to everyone else about people before we talk to God about people. So if you’re anxious about a conflict, take it first to God. This is a timeless ethic of Christian peace. God alone can settle the stirring soul. You will not find peace in your constant conversation about what people have done wrong. This amounts to gossiping.
When you and that individual are both walking worthy of the gospel, you can have the most direct disagreements cordially and respectfully, and you can take it to the Lord in prayer, individually and even together. You can pray together about it.
The Promise
The peace of God will guard you and the God of peace will be with you.
If you live with this kind of Christian ethic of peace in God’s household, the peace of God will guard you and the God of peace will be with you. So while you’re straining forward, you’re walking worthy of the gospel, even through conflict or worry, the peace of God which surpasses understanding will guard your heart and your mind in Christ Jesus (Verse 7); the God of peace will be with you (Verse 9).
To acquire the peace of God, you go to the God of peace.
This applies personally and interpersonally. When anxiety grips your soul, stand firm in the Christian ethic, and bare your heart to God in prayer. When, like Euodias and Syntyche, interpersonal conflict threatens the good fellowship of the Church, stand firm in the Christian ethic, and bare your heart to God in prayer. There are a lot of things in our culture which pass as peace though they are not. But there’s a peculiar kind of peace that God promises. It’s supernatural. It’s not something you will ever find apart from faith in God, through Jesus Christ. This peace will guard your heart and mind. It takes post at the gates of your affections and at the gates of your thoughts, and it protects you from being held captive by the works of our enemy.
Your Response
What specific action does God expect from you now, at this very moment?
Are you anxious about a personal matter? Let God’s word just calmly wash over you today.
Is there an interpersonal conflict between you and someone that the Holy Spirit has impressed on your heart? Seek reconciliation with your brother or sister in Christ.
Have you reconciled with God of the ages who sent his only sinless son to die for you? The greatest conflict resolution in all of history happened when Jesus died in your place. If you cannot point back to a moment in your life when you gave your life to Jesus, the great news is that you can do it right now. Just tell Him now that you believe Him and accept Him to be your Lord and Savior.
Adapted from a message by Dr. Tony Wolfe
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